Taking Weekend Tennis Seriously

If you look up my USTA league record on USTA TennisLink as I do before bed each night, you will notice that I am winless in 4.5 league doubles since November of 2013 through this very moment.*

*Technically I’ve won one match…when I played against two 4.0s…with a 4.5 doubles partner…sooooo…

That’s right. I haven’t won a 4.5 USTA league doubles match in over a year.

What’s worse is that starting with the USTA 2014 spring/summer league playoffs through the time of this writing, I have won all my 4.5 USTA singles matches.**

**Never you mind that three of the last four singles matches came down to match tiebreaks, which means I got some seriously lucky bounces. Stop raining on the point I’m trying to make.

This is why I captain a 4.5 USTA team.

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The bump up from 3.5 to 4.0* seems to always come with the same general response: “IT’S ABOUT DANG TIME. Stupid computer. Like, of course, I’m not a 3.5. Gah, the embarrassment I’ve had to endure…”

The bump up from 4.0 to 4.5* also seems to always come with its own general response: “The USTA rating system is a joke! There goes a year of my life. I’m going to get killed. I am NOT a 4.5. You’re kidding, right? Well, there went winning…”

*I’m using specific ratings a) because it’s true and b) to make the post easier to follow, but of course, these feelings of joy or dread can be applied at any level. We all know people who were convinced being bumped up to 4.0 was the end of their tennis world as they knew it. And then quit tennis. Sigh.

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Here is a list of tennis etiquette rules every person who picks up the ole tennis racquet should know when it comes to playing tennis.

Some of these are actual but commonly violated rules that can be found in either the International Tennis Federation (ITF) Rules of Tennis and/or The Code. Together, those two handbooks govern most tennis leagues and tournaments.

Some of these are not stated in either of those doctrines but are the unwritten, common courtesy guidelines that are often breached by inexperienced players.

You all are most welcome!

In no particular order:

• Practice matches are two hours long at a minimum. That’s how long it takes to play a worthwhile for-fun match. If you don’t have two hours to play tennis, let the organizer know you’ll only be able to play for an hour and a half and see if she’s cool with that. And if you can’t play for at least an hour and a half, you can’t play at all.

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